Linkin Park sings “Waiting for the End”…
This is not the end / This is not the beginning / Just a voice like a riot / Rocking every revision / But you listen to the tone / And the violent rhythm / Though the words sound steady / Something emptys within em / We say yeah / With fists flying up in the air / Like we’re holding onto something that’s invisible there / Cuz we’re living at the mercy of the pain and the fear / Until we dead it forget it / Let it all disappear / Waiting for the end to come / Wishing I had strength to stand / This is not what I had planned / It’s out of my control / Flying at the speed of light / Thoughts were spinning in my head / So many things were left unsaid / It’s hard to let you go / I know what it takes to move on / I know how it feels to lie / All I wanna do is trade this life for something new / Holding on to what I haven’t got / Sitting in an empty room / Trying to forget the past / This was never meant to last / I wish it wasn’t so
What was left when that fire was gone / I thought it felt right but that right was wrong / All caught up in the eye of the storm / And trying to figure out what it’s like moving on / And I don’t even know what kind of things I said / My mouth kept moving and my mind went dead / Picking up those pieces now where to begin / The hardest part of ending is starting again / All I wanna do is trade this life for something new / Holding on to what I haven’t got / This is not the end / This is not the beginning / Just a voice like a riot / Rocking every revision / But you listen to the tone / And the violent rhythm / Though the words sound steady / Something emptys within em / We say yeah / With fists flying up in the air / Like we’re holding onto something that’s invisible there / Cuz we’re living at the mercy of the pain and the fear / Until we dead it forget it / Let it all disappear
I like the passion in this song. It speaks to the heart cry of culture today.
The desperation one feels after a break-up can be devastating to your emotions. I remember this feeling so well in high school and college. I wished that it was just a feeling over break ups back then, but the feelings persisted through my adult life in the business world and even the church. What do we do with all this emotion? Can there really be nothing more to be sung than words like… “cuz we’re living at the mercy of the pain and the fear, until we dead forget it, let it all disappear”?
Jesus Christ himself recognized the desperation, isolation and separation people feel when we lose someone we love. He cried at the graveside of his friend Lazarus and wept over the city of Jerusalem. Jesus recognized the desperation of the longing touch of the woman with the issue of blood who reached for a touch of the hem of his garment… and power went out from him. He knows when a widow from the town of Nain cries over her dead son being brought to burial, how she must have felt with loss overwhelming her. Luke 7:13, “When the Lord saw her, his heart went out to her and he said, “Don’t cry.”
Jesus knows our overwhelming grief and sorrow that we face, like Linkin Park sings about… but is it really a life to be lived at “the mercy of the pain and the fear”? I think not. Do we really have no say in how pain and fear affect our life? Again, I disagree.
The resurrection of Christ Jesus, our Lord and Savior… changes everything. Oh, it doesn’t change the fact that we face pain & fear daily. In fact, as Christ followers we are called to live a life of suffering. Ironically, Jesus himself tells those who call him Lord to “take up their cross and follow him”. Taking up your cross and following the way of the Savior, is one deep and profound calling into the life of suffering. But why? What is the benefit of living a life like Jesus, that doesn’t achieve fame, fortune, and all the trimmings? Why would a God who created this world with his very voice and breath, call his beloved children to a life of suffering and pain? Is God some kind of cosmic kill-joy that takes pleasure in the pain and torture of his creatures? Is God a puppet master that wishes for his little earthlings to linger in a life of pain, so that he gets some demented pleasure from our groaning? NO He is not a God like this.
God’s greatest desire is that his people take the nature of his son Jesus Christ. Profoundly, God is trinity, Father, Son and Holy Spirit. He is perfect unity in his communication and love for all three. Out of his perfect relationship, he created a world that would experience the love, grace, kindness and continuing creation of the world in which we live. The surrender and death of His Son, Jesus is more than a cute Easter card in the spring. It’s a radical transformation of the identity, belonging and purpose of the very creation he spoke into existence. When his children surrender to a life of suffering, as Jesus suffered, we willingly take on the life of being shaped, molded and patterned after Jesus. It is the very life of choosing to be chiseled for God’s sake.
Romans 5:3-5, “3 Not only so, but wet also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”
We glory in our sufferings for the process of what is built up in us… Perseverance, Character, Hope… and the love of God through the Holy Spirit. We are chiseled and shaped, for the glory of God, so that when suffering comes then we can speak of the goodness of God despite our circumstances. We can tell of the wonderful grace of God who changed everything in the resurrection of Jesus. We are not controlled by or “living at the mercy of the pain and the fear” Linkin Park… In Christ Jesus, we are redeemed from pain and fear. In the life of Jesus, we are able to handle the break up, the distance, the loneliness and isolation that comes after relationships disappoint, not because we are better… but because the grace of God has been chiseling us to handle pain, disappointment and fear in new ways, not old ways.
As one who follows the way of Jesus, I’m not waiting for the end “of my loneliness, depression, fear, pain, despair” … for in Christ all this brokenness has been met and mended. Relationships are not the enemy. The battle is not to see how fast I can find another emotional ‘high’ to bring me out of my despair… the battle is won in relationship with the God who loved me enough to end the struggle for why suffering happens.